Please and Thank You

Please and thank you. Foreign concepts? Overused cliches? Not at all - it's common courtesy - although I've found it's not all that common these days. I was reminded of it yesterday, when I went to Duane Reede to pick up a prescription. I was a good week late picking it up, due to procrastination/laziness. When I tried to pick it up I was told it had expired, thus the prescription would have to be resubmitted. Okay, I said, I understand. Made a joke about my laziness. The pharmacist was dumbfounded. He said if I could wait 15 minutes, he could submit it now. Sure, I said, but don't rush it (after all, it was my fault). Again, he was dumbfounded. He said wait just one minute - and it was all it took - he returned with my prescription. He said that 9 out of 10 people would have chewed him out and blamed him for the delay, and he was reciprocating my kindness by rushing the order as fast as he could. I said thank you - I really didn't expect it. But then I realized how infrequently this person was thanked in their day to day job. How often he was blamed by people for their own errors - after all, prescription refills expire because the prescriptions themselves can expire - it's for our own protection. What would be the purpose of getting angry? What's the benefit in making demands, instead of saying please?

I was flooded with memories of weddings, favors, and other things I've done without receiving a thank you - or requests made of me without saying please. They're small words that say so much. I'm less responsive to people who don't say these words because it speaks volumes about how you treat people. When you make a demand or request and don't say please, you sound entitled. If someone goes out of their way for you and you don't say thank you, it comes across as inconsiderate. I am always, always, always happy to help others. But what I (and others) want in return isn't a dramatic gesture or a favor in return. People want to be thanked because they put time and effort into helping you and you should acknowledge that.

When I feel at times like the entire world is against me, or I've had a bad day, it's very easy to turn inward and look at what everyone is doing to hurt/hinder/humble you. But what is important to realize is that most people are just trying to get through their day, same as you. And if they take the time to help you - give you recommendations for travel, or assistance for an event (such as a wedding), or a favor to a friend - just remember to say thank you. And if you're asking for help, remember to say please. Small words speak volumes, and their absence says just as much. I'm making a concerted effort to do better at saying please and thank you, be it to my parents, my sweetheart, or my friends! We can all do better :)